My ADHD Man

 

I love my hubby so much. He stood by me when my mom developed dementia and, at the same time, he lost his job and his rheumatoid arthritis came roaring back. Through thick and thin, we stuck together and have been together for 20 years. He is my ADHD man because this disease ( is it a disease?) is very much part of our lives. For the past 2 months, his ADHD has been in the forefront and it has been tiring. It is hard to explain, because it represents itself differently in each person but his is the classic- he is bouncing off the walls, interrupts, quick to anger, has no time, very tired plus more. His mind is exploding because he is thinking of all the things needs to do all at once and can’t shut it down. He is working on the old home plus he fixes the landscaping at an Esso station that his best friend manages. He takes care of me and the every day house stuff despite his severe arthritis. He sis Speedy Gonzales on steroids…lol. With this in mind, he can exhaust me but how I love him. I am entering the Monday Music Moves Me which is Freebie Week.

1. YOU SPIN ME ROUND BY DEAD OR ALIVE-1984

This song pops into my head, often, when he is talking to me, then takes off to take care of something, tells the cats to settle down, veers downstairs to get something, comes up with something else, comes back to me to continue telling me the story, but takes off outside to tend to something only to come inside to go downstairs to get the item he originally was going to pick up. He comes back to me finishes the story, which takes an additional 10 minutes. When I start telling him a similar story which would take 3 sentences, he tells me he has no time, because he has to walk to dog, tend to the garden, clean the cat litter, cut up some wood and then he asks me what I was going to say. I tell him it’s not important and with tht, he gives me a quick kiss and off he goes…

2. YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY SUNG BY FINE YOUNG CANNIBALS-1988

My hubby will talk, a lot, about politics and what he has seen on the various news channels he watches. When he asks me if I know about such and such, and I don’t, he   Says, “ how do you NOT know? You should know this.” He tells me that I should not drink my orange juice and soda water as much and should drink more water. I have told him that the water sits in my stomach and I have thrown up when I drank too much water. I can jump up and down and I sound like a jug of water because you can hear it swishing around. He criticizes, with the best intentions, that I eat the same thing and that may not be the best thing. If I leave something on the table, he brings it to me and tells me to stop doing that as it drives him crazy. I start not doing that but if I do it once after 3 months of not doing it, he tells me that I am constantly doing this. I always stand up for myself, but he disagrees with me and tells me that I am always doing it. Time and memory are selective. He can drive me nuts!

3. WIPEOUT SUNG BY THE SUFARIS-1963

I can come home, dead tired from working and counselling 7 people per day plus the paperwork after. Last night, I got home around 9pm. Hubby is amazing because he made me a salad-a very nice and rich salad with the chicken in the microwave ready to be heated and placed on my salad. He worked at the Esso station and was recuperating from his day. Remember, he is on major drugs which keep him vital. And if he was not on these, he probably would already be in a wheelchair with all his joints swollen. I sit down to eat in the TV room and turn the TV on only to have my hubby get upset because he was watching  YouTube video on his phone. I told him when I had something on my IPad, he got angry because he was watching the TV and I should move to a different room. He does not remember this and starts a rant which I ignore and eat my delicious salad. When he asked me, again about something, I lost my cool and did raise my voice saying the day and time again. He gets all upset, tells me he can’t talk to me(lol), that he is tired and goes upstairs to brush his teeth. He comes down, gives me a kiss goodnight and goes to sleep. He has wiped himself out….and me. 

For all this, he makes me laugh, he stands by me, takes care of the house and garden, walks the dog and makes sure I have dinner when I come home. We can talk about everything and, once we realize we are in agreement, we are aok and laughing. He tells me how lucky he is and that I am his angel.